Winter Confessions

Some of you may remember my summer confessions. I have had such a "got it all together" winter, that I thought it was time for an installment of winter confessions. Ya know, since I've got it all together and stuff.

10. When parents drop their kids off for me to babysit in the morning, I am not wearing my pajamas. And when they come back that afternoon to pick them up, I do not rush upstairs and dress quickly so they don't think I am a big lazy slob. And they are totally tricked because my hair and make-up are perfect too.

9. When I was searching for something in my closet, I did not find a bag full of clothes that I had bought Kate for her birthday. In October. That I didn't even remember that I had lost.

8. My children do not make me want to cuss with their more annoying behaviors. When I am cleaning the toilet, I do not want to scream the name of the stuff that is smeared all over it.

7. I did not have to confess to my mother that I now understood why she talked the way she did when I was a child.

6. While we are at it, my children do not have the incessantly annoying behaviors named above because I am an awesome parent who knows how to properly bring up my children.

5. I did not forget essential ingredients for dinner three times in one week. Twice during spaghetti night. And there aren't that many ingredients in spaghetti.

4. When Will had a stomach virus and he was whining loudly at 5am and I was trying to sleep, I did not tell him that the best thing for a sore tummy was to lie real still, and most importantly to not make any noise.

3. When one of my clients carefully and lovingly prepared food for their child, I did not throw it out because said food would've made an incredible mess and taken me a good 20 minutes to clean up. (And no, client-reading-this-post, I am sure it is not something you fixed. It was someone else.)

2. When my own kids did not want to eat leftovers from new recipes I have been trying out lately, I did not feed them to one client in particular, knowing "Mikey" will eat anything. (And no, client-reading-this-post, it wasn't your child. It was someone else.)

1. I have not stopped taking my children to the library because I racked up so many over-due fines over our Christmas travels that I am embarrassed to show my face there.

And yes, I am dead serious. Especially if you didn't notice any sarcasm.