Why do I have to know that?

Will is in kindergarten and is learning to read. He has been sounding out basic sound patterns for about a year. Words that rhyme with his name were the first ones he learned - pill, dill, bill, fill... you get the idea. His opinion was that his name was cool, and rhyming was cool, so therefore these words were worth learning. But he hasn't been very interested in the rest of the words, although he has slowly picked up most basic patterns. He loves books, and often brings me a book to read. He reads the first page himself, then gets frustrated and/or bored, and asks me to read the rest of it to him. Patience is not his strong suit.

So I was pleased when his teacher finally started sending home books for him to read for homework, knowing that she was now reinforcing what I had been working on with him at home.

Last week we sat down to read one such book, entitled I Like Noise. It featured Mr. N, who likes noise. (Riveting, I know, but he likes them so I am cool with it. Plus, I loved the Letter People when I was a kindergartner, thanks to Ms. Carolyn.) One page said, "I hear a telephone," and there was a picture of Mr. N and his telephone. When Will got to this page he said, "I hear a phone." I told him to back up and read the word again - sound out the first few letters. He sounded out "tele" and realized his mistake.

He then looked at me with a frown on his face and said (remember, you have say it without the R sound), "Why in the world do they think I need to know the word "telephone"? I am only in kindergarten!"

Apparently learning new things isn't a big priority right now. Just recess and the bus. We will have to work on that too.

A Wee Trip

I am once again behind on blogging and picture posting, but it is for a very good reason.

A few months ago Tim and I started talking about taking a little trip. We were thinking of a long weekend in New York or something because we hadn't been on a vacation alone since Kate NaNa has been home. We love love love to travel together, so we really were hoping to steal away, with a little (ok, a lot) of help from Mimi, Arlie, Daddy John, and Jee.

But the more we talked about it, we realized that it is cold in New York. And snowy. And that is what we are trying to escape here.

So we decided to go somewhere we have never been, and we went south instead. To the Caribbean. Eighty-five and sunny, baby. Oh yeah. We were on a cruise that stopped at Roatan, Honduras, and Cozumel, Mexico. We laid by the pool and ate like piggies (although not at the same time).

Roatan is this little island that the big hotels and chain stores haven't discovered yet. We rented a scooter and buzzed around the island, seeing sights like this.

And then we sat on a beach and looked at sights like this.

I totally wanted to just miss the boat and stay for a week.

But the next day we were in Mexico, although we never actually set foot on Cozumel. We got off the ship, got onto a ferry that took us to the mainland, and then a bus that went to the Tulum Mayan ruins.

I know I'm a big nerd, but I love stuff like this. Especially when there is a great beach on the other side of that temple, where we ate lunch and swam in the surf. I love vacation.

We also got to spend a little time with my grandmother in Florida, which was a total treat even if it was really cold there.

Now, we are back to reality. Snow and sleet (which means snow days for the kids), bad colds, and work. But that sunshine is keeping me going. Surely spring is just around the corner!

Booooooored

My kids have been out of school since Tuesday because of snow. This is on top of the week or so they missed before Christmas for snow. Our roads have been fairly clear (i.e., we aren't entirely trapped in our home), but I am still starting to go a little stir crazy, and I'm not the only one. Yesterday, if my children merely bumped into each other, it resulted in much weeping and gnashing of teeth. We are all pretty sick of looking at each other.

So this morning I called a dear friend who works in the school system. He and his wife don't have kids yet, and he offered to hang out with my kids in the event that I needed a little break. I am definitely there. Break, please!

While I was talking to him, he said that he was glad I had called because he was starting to get a little bored. When I hear people say this it always makes me smile a little.

Bored. I hear that word a lot from my kids, and it rarely produces a smile. Usually when they come in with that whiny voice, declaring, "I'm booooooored.....I don't know what to dooooooooo....." I just want to hit someone. But I refrain. Instead, I launch into my pre-manufactured speech:

Oh, you're bored? Poor thing. I feel like this is my fault. I let you watch entirely too much TV yesterday. If I hadn't let you watch television, you wouldn't have forgotten how to entertain yourself, and you wouldn't be bored now. So, tell you what, I won't let you watch TV anymore since it apparently steals your creativity. Also, feel free to go clean your room, fold the towels, or wash the dishes if you are out of things to do. And then we can bag up all of your "boring" toys and give them to a family whose kids would enjoy them more. What do you think about that?

You can imagine the eye rolling that occurs after this. I think Will was the youngest person I ever met capable of recognizing sarcasm. When he was about four years old he would cock his head to the side and say, "Mommy, was that a sarcasm?" Yes, baby, very good.

Anyway, I remember boredom. In college or when Tim and I were newlyweds, I can remember saying things like, I'm bored. Let's go into town and rent a movie or go out to eat or go the mall or whatever I thought sounded like a good solution to not having anything to do.

I don't think I have been bored one second since Ben was born. I'm not saying that my children are entertaining. They are, but that isn't my point. My point is that there is always something to do - change a diaper, prepare a meal, clean the floors... I could go on here, but you get the idea. When I actually do have a free moment, I am more than happy to sit with my nothingness and just veg. Not that I actually remember that happening in the last 8 years.

I wonder if boredom returns after the children fly the coop. (Today it feels more like a coop than a nest.) Not that I want to be bored again. I just want the freedom to be bored if I feel like it.

Christmas: The Not-So-Short Version

Our December was as busy as ever, and alas, my blog has suffered. So, without further ado, here is my attempt to condense the whole month into one post.

Kate rocked her "Santa dress."The kids sang in the annual Christmas program at church. Will and Kate especially loved singing in it this year.

We celebrated Tim's birthday.

Here's a random picture just because I thought it was cute.

The kids missed a week's worth of school because of snow, snow, and more snow. This coincided with the arrival of Uncle Jacob and Aunt Alison for Christmas, and we even got Uncle Jacob snowed-in at our house one night!

We had multiple celebrations with my side of the family, including parties at Aunt Sally's, my mom's, and my dad's. We woke up on Thursday and opened presents at my mom's. Will calls that day Thanks Day. He even made Arlie write it on his calendar.

The kids decorated the tree this year, and I was so impressed I will let them do it again next year.

(Not-so) Wide-eyed children woke up before their bleary-eyed parents on Christmas morning .

Many presents were opened. Some favorites included a remote control R2D2, the Trio wizard's castle, Star Wars action figures galore, ZhuZhu pets, and finger nail polish (for Kate NaNa, of course).

We went to Tim's parents, where we forced the kids to take the annual cousins-on-the-stairs picture. Basically a stall tactic before the adults are ready to open presents.

My sister-in-law taught my kids how to play Angry Birds. Much laughter ensued.

My brother-in-law let his wife put his hair in a faux hawk. More laughter ensued. I only wish that I had a pic when he was also wearing the skinny jeans and Rob Bell glasses too. That would make my day complete:)

Hope your celebrations were joyous too! Merry Christmas!

Christmas Gifts

I know that all of you out there in Blog-Land are totally done Christmas shopping, but just in case you are still looking for the perfect gift that is maybe just a little bit different (or maybe just an organization to give an end-of-year donation to), I thought I would share some ideas.

I love shopping with organizations that are fair trade. I recently discovered Heavenly Treasures Handicrafts. It is a Christian micro-enterprise company that features items made around the world. Sales support a variety of causes, including orphanages, pastors, and even just people trying to make a living and support their families (ahem, family preservation). They also work with World Vision and have some really cool items, including bags, jewelry, kitchen items, and more. Very fun stuff. (**Update: I just got a package in the mail full of goodies from HT Handicrafts, and I love them even more now! - Quality stuff, quick delivery!)

Another place I like to go to ooh and ahh is Scarlet Threads. Based in China, they make oh-so-pretty handmade items. I am currently in love with the red and black tree skirt. (**Update: The dh just ordered me one:) Can't wait to get it!)

Or maybe you are considering making a charitable donation in someone's name? Honestly, I think this is an awesome way to honor someone. Check out the sites below.

Organizations that provide orphan care (all of which offer opportunities to sponsor children in China, donate to surgeries, special projects like formula, facilities, etc.):
Pearl River Outreach
New Day Foster Homes
Starfish Foster Homes
Love Without Boundaries
An Orphan's Wish
Half the Sky

Another wonderful way to give is to fund organizations that support family preservation. Simply put, if we care about orphans, we have to care about the causes of abandonment. Some of the main causes are poverty and disease, so by helping fight poverty and disease, we are helping to keep families together.

A lot of organizations have gift catalogues where you can purchase things like goats and wells for families/communities in need. Here are a few cool ones:
Heifer International
Samaritan's Purse
World Vision

Another organization I learned about a few months ago is Kiva. They provide small business loans to people in developing countries. You can loan someone as little as $25, and then when it is repaid you can reinvest in another small business. This is another great way to empower women to support and preserve their families. I also think this would be an awesome Christmas gift to someone, because they could watch what happens to the money, and when it is repaid, they can loan it out again and again.

And don't forget charity: water! This is an organization that got the attention of my 6 year old, and I recently mentioned it here. Will came downstairs one day holding his birthday money and announced he wanted to give it to people who needed it more than him. Charity: water is who he chose. They build wells for communities that need clean water. (And it isn't too late to donate to the birthday fund either, so go check it out!)

Edge Outreach is one of only 2 organizations in the world who teach people how to repair the hand pumps that go on wells in developing countries. They also are hard at work in Haiti, fighting for clean water.

Heartline Ministries works in Haiti to support women and their families. They provide prenatal support, deliver babies in a safe and clean environment, and provide parenting and nutrition classes. They are currently working to build a women's hospital so they can help women with more complicated deliveries/pregnancies. In other words, they are fighting to help moms keep their babies, so poverty doesn't lead to abandonment. You can read more about their work on this blog or this one.

And I have a feeling that you all have some of your own favorite places to shop and/or give. So, please drop a comment and tell us what organizations you love!

Ho Ho Ho

We have had an interesting Santa dynamic around here the last couple of years. You see, when Ben was little, neither of us cared to encourage the Santa story, largely because we felt it was about the gifts rather than the "magic." At the same time, when he came home excitedly telling us what other people had told him about Santa, we didn't have the heart to tell him that Santa wasn't real. And the same story continued with Will. We never told them anything about Santa because we didn't want to lie, but we didn't discourage it either.

Kate, on the other hand, has known for a long time that Santa isn't real. When she was two, she didn't understand anything going on, as she had only been home a couple of months. Then, last year at age three, every time she saw Santa, she would start screaming and crying, begging me, "Don't let Mrs. Claus get me!" I have no idea where her fear of Mrs. Claus came from, or if she was confused about who that was since we never bumped into the lady, but regardless, she did that several times last year. One morning after I had sent the boys off to school I sat her down and explained that Santa wasn't real and Daddy and I brought the presents. (And, yes, I also explained that this was a big secret, and to my knowledge she never spilled the beans.) She was relieved, and she thankfully stopped crying at every shopping mall we went into.

Fast forward to this year, and I thought we would play this out the same way. A month or so ago, Ben (age 8) started asking the typical figuring-it-out questions. He finally asked me point blank if Santa was real or not. I said, "What do you think?" He replied, "I think that if he was you would just say yes." But then a few days later, he was back to adamantly insisting that Santa was real. I knew that meant he knew but wanted to pretend, so I dropped it.

Then on Wednesday, Will (age 6) was in a bookstore with Mimi when they ran into the Big Guy shopping. Santa started talking to Will, but Will was dumbstruck. (Wouldn't you be, too?) Tonight we were in the van, just me and the three kids, and the boys started drilling me with questions about all things Santa. (Personally, I blame Michael Jackson's "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus," which was on the radio, but it probably would've come up sooner or later anyway.)

Will: I know that Santa isn't real.
Me: And why do you think that?
Will: Because the other day when I saw him at the bookstore, he had a wallet and was shopping. Everybody knows that Santa makes presents, not buys them. And why would he be here in this town anyway?
Me: Hmmm.
Will: And there were three of them.
Me: Three of what?
Will: Three Santas. One was ringing a Salvation Army bell. One was shopping and talked to me. And one was asking kids what they wanted for Christmas.
Me: You mean he was sitting in a big chair and kids were in his lap?
Will: Yes. So either they were following me around or Santa's not real.
Me: Hmmm.
Will: And once, I looked in front of me, and there was Santa talking to kids, and I looked behind me, and Santa was buying something. Definitely not Santa.
Ben: Well, I think Santa is in the North Pole with his elves making toys right now in his workshop anyway.
Will: And you know that Elf on the Shelf thing? He is definitely not real. There might really be elves, but the Elf on the Shelf is not.
Ben: How do you know?
Will: I felt of him once. He isn't real.
Ben: I think he is.
Will: The others might be, but not him. He is a toy.
Kate: Can we play Guess Who now?
Me: Umm, not right now, darling, the boys and I are talking.
Ben: Mom, is he real or not?

Will: Just tell us!

Me: What do you think, sweetheart?
Will: I don't think he is, but everyone in my class thinks he is real.
Ben: But what do they know? They're only kindergartners.
Will: That is true. They are kindergartners, and I am the smartest one.
Ben: How do you know?
Will: Because Mrs. T. says that my class is the best class of kindergartners, and I am the smartest in my class, so I must be the smartest kindergartner.

The conversation then devolved into an argument between the boys about whether Will's logic and evidence were faulty or not.

Once home, Will and I were alone, and the conversation began again. He reiterated that he did not believe in Santa. I said that was fine, but it was important that he not tell other kids that because it would hurt their feelings and make them sad.

And what is the first thing he does? The first thing he does with every single shred of information he ever has. He told Ben.

I went in to tuck Ben into bed, and he said, "Will told me you told him the truth."
Me: What I told Will is that if he doesn't want to believe, that is fine, but he shouldn't ruin the fun for others.
Ben: But that is pretty much the same thing as telling him Santa isn't real.
Me: I am sorry. Are you sad?
Ben: Disappointed. I was hoping it was real.
Me: I understand. I was really sad when I found out. I cried a lot. And I was really mad at Daddy John.
Ben: (Laughs at first, then gets serious) But why would grown-ups make this stuff up?
Me: I think they want to believe in magic because it is fun to think that Santa is real. It is exciting to think that presents will magically appear under your tree. And presents will still magically appear under your tree.
Ben: (Grins) But now I know where they really come from.

He was OK when I said goodnight, but I am more sad about all of this than I thought I would be. Don't get me wrong. I don't regret any of what I said (although some of the grandparents are probably really mad at me right now). Part of it is that it takes me back to the day I found out, and how devastated I was. I don't think Ben is as sad as I was. And Will just seems satisfied that he was right about something.

There is more to it. Tonight my boys lost a little bit of their innocence. A little bit of magic is gone, and they won't get it back. Growing up is hard work, and I want them to be kids for as long as possible. All of this makes me realize how quickly they are growing up. I hugged them just a little longer, cuddled them a little closer, while they still want me to. Someday I will blink, and it will be gone.

Birthday Gifts

In October, Will got some cash as a late birthday gift. Now, you need to understand that he has very little concept of money, but he still likes to hoard it. If he finds a coin, it automatically gets put in his piggy bank, even if it probably doesn't belong to him. His philosophy is Finders Keepers. He doesn't really like to spend it either. Back in September I took him on a "date" to the bookstore. I told him I would buy him one book, but if he wanted another one, he would have to pay for it out of his piggy bank stash. He picked out a comic book that he wanted me to buy him, and then he headed straight for the discount section. He would pick up a book and say, "How much is this?"
Me: $6.50.
Will: Too much. How about this one?
Me: $3.50 -You can afford that one.
Will: Still too much. What about this?
Me: $1.99.
Will: This is the one!

Anyway, back to the birthday cash. He came down the stairs holding the $20 and announced to Tim and I that he wanted to give his money to someone who needed it more than he did. I got a big lump in my throat and a tear in my eye, and thought I had never been more proud. Tim agreed to help him choose how to give his money away. He had recently learned about an organization called charity: water. From their website, "charity: water is a non-profit organization bringing clean and safe drinking water to people in developing nations." Dirty water kills more people every year than anything else. After looking at the photos of dirty water on the website, and learning how some people have to walk miles to get water that comes from ponds and streams that are contaminated, Will decided to donate his $20 to charity: water.


Tim's birthday is coming up soon - next weekend, in fact. And for his birthday this year, he isn't asking for gifts. Honestly, he has a warm home, clean food, a good job, a healthy family. What else do we really need? What he would like is for others to be able to feed their children without worrying about cholera, dysentery, hepatitis A, or the many other diseases that can pass through water and steal health and life.


So I am asking you to get involved too. It would make Tim's birthday even more fabulous if a lot of people would donate to charity: water. Simply go to his my charity: water page (*update-now closed*) and make a donation. You can even do it anonymously if you want:)

Come on, change a child's life and make my husband's birthday awesome! Doesn't that sound like fun?